Salvation Armed Forces Guy

The Salvation Armed Forces Guy is a high ranking employee of the Salvation Armed Forces, and the Main Antagonist of The Salvation Armed Forces. He is an extremely friendly person, very agreeable, but is also quick to violence and proficient with a bell. His relationship with the Salvation Service Woman is unclear, it may be simple coworkership or it may be a true romance.

Start
At the very start of the episode, he makes several coerce Dan into donating, thanking him when he 'donates' his car and attempting to talk him into buying a toaster. When Dan reveals he didn't intend to donate his car, he simply replies "Whoops", and defends his actions by claiming it wasn't drivable. Dan refuses to back down, and he is eventually forced to resort to force, attacking Dan and triggering the episode.

He apparently aced hand to hand combat training, and easily thwarts a second attempt from Dan after hearing his coworkers alarm bell.

Trojan Chair Incident
Doubling as a truck driver, he and his coworker proceed to load up a large red chair that, unknown to them, has Dan hiding inside it. It's apparently bound for a location across town. After a crate of scorpians spill, he is forced to sterilize the chair(unintentionally gassing Dan) Dan proceeds to steal the location of his car at the the SAF Eagle Rock Impound, while he goes home for the night.

He rushes to the Impound later when the alarm sounds, stopping Dan's escape attempt in it's track with the help of the dogs.

SAF VS Greatwill
Near the end of the episode, he shows up in time to stop Dan from attacking the guard, but not in time to stop the Greatwill Employees from escaping with Dan's Car. He chases after them, intent on recapturing the guy, giving Dan an opportunity to escape.

It appears he failed to catch the car(as he only had a bike) as by the time Dan counterattacks at their main location in Hollywood, he is back to his normal job. He attempts to scare off Dan, but Dan came prepared, and unleashed a horde of dogs, chasing off the Salvation Armed Forces Guy once and for all.

Trivia

 * He is a parody of the sterotypical 'nice charity worker', always smiling and working with optimism.
 * He apparently aced hand to hand training and repeatedly defeats Dan in combat, making him one of the most physically powerful humans on the show alongside Elise Pearson and The Hockey Mask Maniac
 * This had lead to a Fan Theory by Captain Jerk that he is actually an ex-secret agent of The Shadow Government, who gave up on the life due to being too empathetic and kind for the life of a killer.
 * His car has a bell on it, similar to the one he uses.
 * He can distinguish nearly identical bells nearly by sound.