The Theatre Owners (also sometimes referred to as the purple haired ladies) are a trio of women who run the Shakespeare Dinner Theatre. The first one is shorter with larger hips and a softer voice. She appears to be the nice one of the trio. The middle one is taller and skinnier, with a raspier, slightly more aged voice. She's slightly more assertive. The final one is fatter and shorter, and her voice and personality are unknown, as she never speaks.
Events of Ye Olde Shakespeare Dinner Theatre
(Note. Due to their lack of names and always appearing together, I will be referring to the shorter, softer spoken one as Hips, the taller one as Skinny, and the fat one as Fatty. For convenience sake) During the events of "Ye Olde Shakespeare Dinner Theatre" they were first seen discussing a request by the actors to have a mini fridge put into the dressing room. Skinny seems annoyed by their request, but Hips folds immediately, calmly stating they can't run a theatre company without actors. After his poorly timed laugh, they noticed Dan, but they don't question him much, taking his answer at face value and replying with nothing more then a smug smirk, Skinny apparently finding him 'nice'
Later in the episode, after the Theatre Custodian disappears, they're seen outside with the Head Theatre Actor, Hips noting this to be the third such strange occurrence since that morning. (Skinny cutting in to remind the Head Actor of Tye) After this they walk off, informing the Head Actor he has every role now before apparently returning to their quarters.
Near the end of the episode, after Dan incites a riot that leads to their building being torched, they are seen outside. The three bid farewell to their theatre, Skinny and Hips saying a few words before the three walk off into the night, never to be see again.
- While they are never directly called the owners in episode(leading some to mistake them for narrators) the first scene with them heavily implies they run the Theatre Company.
- They're relationship is never explained, and is left up to interpretation. While they are clearly business partners, it's unclear if the bond goes deeper, with fan interpretations ranging from them being sisters to them being lesbian lovers. The gray, almost purple tinted hair they all share MAY indicate relationship, though the lavender tint could be a dye they all use.
- They appear to be a reference to the three witches in Shakespeare's Macbeth, who also share similarities with the Three Fates. The play Macbeth is infamous for being believed to be cursed, so the reference makes sense as Dan and Elise are removing the actors one by one, staging 'accidents'.
- The first owner, or "Hips", has a cut line during a deleted scene, questioning the paramedics on how they'd remove the donkey head from an actor's head. 
- The characters have no canonical names, and are usually collectively referred to by the term "Theatre Owners", "Theatre Girls", "Purple Haired Women", or "Macbethian Ladies"
- The three characters have been adopted and given fully fledged personalities in Captain Jerk's fanfiction The Dan Vs Everything Chronicles as The Suzinski Sisters, whose paths diverge after the events of their episode.
- Hips becomes Mary Suzinski, a woman held captive by the cooking industry who is freed by Dan and eventually moves in with him. Skinny becomes Susan Suzinski, a loner shop owner struggling after both her sisters vanish who puts on weight and becomes friends with Crunchy. Fatty becomes Andrea Suzinski, a loud and proud independent gal, who becomes wrapped up in Lolas prostitute circuit and eventually becomes friends with the core cast after reuniting with her sisters.